i'm taking a break from the internet. i need to grow and i feel like the internet is blocking me a whole lot from doing that, luring me to see lies and deceit.

see ya later xanga!

On the Safest Ledge- Copeland

Don't look ahead, just run to me
Each step will find the next one recklessly
We'll find ourselves on the safest ledge
Well pardon me, I couldn't help myself
Girl, fall into your life here
If only for a while, I'm here

Could you be happy to fall like a stone
If you'd land right here safe in my arms?
It's fine, lock all your doors through the night
Keep it all right here, safe in my arms
It's fine, it's fine

You felt alone before you ever really knew how alone you were
An empty house, a lonely room
The TV talks the fear right out of you
But you feel like someone's standing by but you'll never know

Could you be happy to fall like a stone
If you'd land right here safe in my arms?
It's fine, lock all your doors through the night
Keep it all right here, safe in my arms
It's fine

The sun burns a hole straight through your old flaws
If you look toward the sky even on your greyest night

Could you be happy now, with the wind in your hair
And your eyes open wide and your feet going nowhere?
Could you be happy to fall like a stone
If you'd land right here safe in my arms?
It's fine, lock all your doors through the night
Keep it all right here, safe in my arms
It's fine

I'm a sinful person and imperfect as well as incomplete. There will always be a side of me that wants to look back at my past and somehow undo the mistakes I did. But it's the mistakes that made me who I am and I like who i've become. The challeges I never thought i'd face i've faced and with time and much tears and effort and television and fights have overcome the road block to the road of teenage adolesence. I know that harder challeges will be in view not far from now and I pray that God will give me the strength and faith to be ready for whatever it may be. Because I know that no matter what I will always have a place to go to in the end and that place is THE list I want my name on. So what to do now is the question. I fear that this is just another feeling, a emotion that comes from time to time and then goes away like a bruise or a paper cut. I've been crawling and was attracted to all the pleasures of the ignorant. Now I see that those pleasures weren't really pleasures but physicality of the pain I felt. I am just a note of a very long well constructed beautiful breathtaking symphony. And like each good song there has to be a point of bittersweet tragedy loss and healing love forgiveness and letting go and moving on.

So this is the point of my life where i raise my cup of gratitute to a new chapter in my life where I will enjoy every minute of whatever it is that God wants me to face with a fierce attitude and humble spirit.